You can’t teach an old blog new tricks

Confessions of a freelancing amateur and blogging novice.

The decision to begin a blog has been both easy and difficult. Allow me to elaborate.

I can see how, after conducting research into the pros and cons of starting a blog, it is a wonderful way to get you into a disciplined frame of mind to write and consequently lend some structure to that writing.

By the end of this exercise I plan, with your assistance, to transform my writing into a vast shining futuristic monolith with mirrored windows and not the ramshackle partially thatched cottage awaiting demolition that it is at the moment.

Prior to researching I was attempting to write everything in alphabetti spaghetti which was unnecessarily messy, expensive and ultimately extremely difficult to deliver to the appropriate audience unless they were localised in my kitchen.

That is of course a mild fiction meant to entertain. I am aware that most successfully published authors, or popular bloggers for that matter, tend not to convey their message in pasta. At least not at the beginning of their careers.

The truth of the matter is that the written word is something that I love.

At the moment I am a struggling office worker struggling to become a struggling writer. If I play my cards right I may eventually make enough money to starve.

For now that sounds more like an insanely idealistic and somewhat impractically lengthy job description. With any luck it will improve over time to just being short and insane.

So why haven’t I done something productive before now?

I have, like many others, fallen foul of the polar opposite of being disciplined and have been deeply ensconced in the all too familiar routine of work, family, commuting and procrastination. It becomes far too easy to find excuses and then justify those excuses with vague reasoning before succumbing to distractions that only serve to compound your lack of motivation.

Oh look, a duck ! Where was I?

A Duck

Cry havoc and let slip the blogs of war.

If you have made it this far and wish to read on, then congratulations, you probably deserve some sort of award. I will now stop digressing and get to the point, yes, there is a point.

My main aim is to chart and document my failures and successes, or indeed successes and failures in attempting to become a freelance writer of resounding ambiguity and enigmatic hairstyle.

I will use this blog as a living breathing resume of sorts; a method of showcasing my distinct lack of formal talent within this field, or for that matter, any field.

I would love for you all to share this journey of self discovery and random diatribe with me and to keep me focused on my goal.

Focus, after all, is a major achievement these days. Whether we are frantically checking emails hoping that a human being is on the other end and not trying to sell us something; or endlessly flicking through videos of kittens peeking over the top of wellington boots and clogging the drain of social media like cute and strangely compelling clumps of hair, we are all being sidetracked.

We are, on a daily basis, subject to completely losing concentration while getting immersed in click through advertising promising us chiselled ankles, delicious ways to both gain and lose weight in some sort of Sisyphean battle of culinary futility and any other in a plethora of brightly coloured and mildly attractive distractions, quizzes and listicles. It’s a wonder that any of us ever get out of bed.

Oh look ! There’s that duck again.

A Duck – but again.


So, I am making a pact with everyone that I will attempt to the best of my abilities to :

  • Write something, anything on a weekly basis at the very least.
  • Make my writing insightful, informative or failing any of these, vaguely entertaining.
  • Cease my procrastinating ways and be more productive.
  • Research running a blog, and promote any material that has assisted me to do so.
  • Value the advice, opinion, assistance and support of my peers.

7 thoughts on “You can’t teach an old blog new tricks

  1. You’ve already achieved one of your goals. You’ve written something good which made me laugh. I also now am inspired to achieve the enigmatic hairstyle of which you speak

    Liked by 1 person

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